letter to my 10 year old daughter

Dearest Nallie,

Ten years ago, you changed my life forever. Coaxing you to come and meet us took 31 hours- and laughing gas, morphine, an epidural and eventually an obstetrician (aka “the professional baby flipper”) to get you out. You have always been a patient girl and you sure took your sweet time coming out so we could meet you.

If you are reading this now or maybe when you have your own baby, I am telling you that your Dad and I had no idea what we are doing - and we still are trying to figure it out.

Before you were born, I had no idea there were so many conflicting messages about parenting. 

Swaddle the baby - burrito her little arms in tightly. But don't do it too tight. Or maybe just don't swaddle at all. 

Nurse the baby on a schedule - even if it means waking baby up. But don't ever wake a sleeping baby. 

Baby needs to sleep in a crib - on their backs - no blankets. But co-sleeping is the best thing you can do to bond with you baby. 

Sleep train your baby - let her cry it out. But never let your baby's cries go unattended.

Mom should stay home because no caregiver can replace a mama. But moms should pursue careers and dreams so your baby knows that she can too.

Make sure your child is safe - inspect every situation. But don't be a helicopter parent - scrapes and bruises are part of life. 

Encourage your child and be their biggest fan. But don't indulge or praise too much - this leads to entitlement. 

Kids need boundaries and limits - your child needs to know you are in charge. But don't be authoritarian - let your child make choices and be independent. 

I really don't know how we made it through those first few years. But somehow by the grace of God, we celebrated each passing year and rejoicing in this adventure of parenting. 

You are and have always been easy to love. You were an 'easy' baby - you were so forgiving of how Daddy and I fumbled with figuring out how to hold you, nurse you, bathe you. By 6 months, I didn't need to track your sleep because you would graciously sleep the whole night most of the time. You have always been eager to learn - when you were a toddler, you learned baby sign quickly. Once we taught you, you were were signing 'milk please', 'more', 'all done' and 'book' all the time. 

You have also been an adventurer. When you first learned to walk, you got into everything. I would find you climbing inside the dishwasher or happily exploring the pantry and throwing things you found like macaroni and chocolate chips across the kitchen floor. One time you found a box of panty-liners and adhered them all over yourself and the bathroom wall. You were so pleased and told me you found so many 'big stickers'! It was hard to be mad at you when you were so cute. We rarely got upset with you. You have always been a good listener and so mindful of rules. 

And here you are now - I can't believe ten years have gone by. You are beautiful inside and out. You have a heart of gold - You are kind and gentle. I can see that you put other people first and always try to help others around you. You still want to hold my hand when we are out - I hope that you won't ever be too old for that. I also admire your patience and you love having quiet time to play and be creative. I hope you keep pursuing the things that you love.  I hope you keep learning to be being brave, using your voice to share your thoughts and I hope you keep being open to try new things. I hope you keep reading ferociously. I hope you keep writing poems and your heart in your diary. I hope you keep loving school and learning.  I hope we keep praying together every night and you learn to trust Jesus with everything. I am so grateful that God blessed me with a sweetheart of a daughter. I love you and have loved watching you grow up. Know that I am always going to be your biggest cheerleader in life.  Know that you are beautiful, cherished and so special. Know that I love you to the moon and back. 

Happy 10th Birthday my love! 

XOXO Mama